Frequently Asked Questions

Thanks so much for following us on this journey. I’ve not been very active on this blog, because I’ve been plowing through A LOT of paperwork. We’re about to see that side of things drop off, and I’m getting a chance to add another entry to this journal. Throughout the past few months, we’ve spoken with many of you, and have encountered a lot of questions – which is awesome! Adoption is not a common process, and each program (country) is different from the next. Here are some of the questions we’ve encountered and the answers to them – in no particular order:

1. Will your daughter’s name be Mei-Mei?

No – we actually haven’t decided on her name yet. Mei mei is the Chinese term for “little sister,” so that is what we are calling her as we discuss our future with Will and Grace. FYI – big brother is ge ge (pronounced gu-gu) and big sister is jie jie (pronounced GiGi – Grace’s nickname).

2. Why China?

Another great question. There are so many children around the world in need of families, and many here in our own country. Through our research, we found that US adoption was not for us at this point in our life. The adoption of a younger child in the US is an uncertain process as you do not know how long the child will be placed in your care and if it will ever become permanent. I’m happy that we try to keep birth families together, but the fact is that Will and Grace are far too young to understand if a child were to be taken from our home after being with us for awhile. We just can’t put them through that.

So, onto other foreign countries. We researched most of them and just decided that China was the right program for us. We weighed cost of adoption, stability of the program, length of stay, and the number of times required to travel to the country. In the end, we found China was right for us.

Now, as time has passed since the initial decision, it’s easy to see that the real answer to “Why China” is simply this: CHINA IS WHERE OUR DAUGHTER IS.

3. Why Special Needs? Do you choose what Special Needs you’ll accept?

We were told about the special needs program after realizing that the current wait for China’s traditional program now is well over 5 years. Friends told us stories of adopted children with an out-turned foot or other minor ailments – all part of the special needs program. Still nervous about this route, we started our research and found children with large birthmarks were considered special needs in China. For those of you who know Will and have seen his leg, you know large, bleeding birthmarks are not new territory for us. So, we dug further and realized that our little family is equipped to handle a lot of other needs as well. Perhaps one day, I’ll write a post about the many special needs we are open to and the process through which we made those decisions. In the meantime, feel free to ask us about any questions you may have about it.

4.Will you get a girl?

Probably. Although, in China’s Waiting Child Program, there are FAR more boys available than girls – opposite of what we assumed. For our family, we feel a little girl will fit in easier and she and Grace will be close in age and able to share a room.

We are VERY happy to answer any questions you may have along the way. Although adoption is a lot of work, we’re also learning how totally do-able it is as well, and would love to share.

Yes, Ben and Katie are Adopting!

We're adopting! It seems many were very surprised when we announced our intentions, and we realized that even though this has been on our hearts for a long time, we never shared it outside our conversations with each other.

Before we even got married, when we had discussions about how many kids we'd like to have, I of course would dream BIG (and maybe even a little crazy) and say that I wanted at least 5 kids. Ben was more realistic and said 2 - maybe one more through adoption. He didn't want to add to overpopulation. Both of us figured we'd know what was right when the time came.

Well, we continued with life, had a beautiful, smart and sensitive son, named Will in 2006. In 2008, little Gracie joined our family and is a crazy, imaginative and stunning little girl. Things were going well for us with these two. We were getting comfortable with our little family of four and feeling good.

Late this past summer, I realized I had been holding on to all their clothing since birth. WOW! 5 years of boy clothes and 3 years of girl clothes = A LOT of storage space in our house. So, we started chatting about whether I would consign them, try and e-bay them, or what. As I was embarking on the consignment project, I said, "we have to be sure this is it." Ben answered, "Well, I don't know, maybe we'll adopt one day, but I think we're done 'having' kids." My only response was, "OK, but we need to set a date as to when we want to start this phase if we're really serious about it. We have to stop talking about it. Maybe right after Christmas we should sit down and seriously make decisions."

Turns out, we didn't need to wait for Christmas. When I woke the next morning, Ben said he had spent the night thinking about it, and although he thought of a few reasons not to move forward (new cars, vacations), they were not nearly as important as growing our family and bringing an orphan home to a forever family. How's that for my man who once upon a time didn't want to contribute to overpopulation? (Seems God can melt even stubborn and skeptical hearts. ;) )

Once I picked my chin off the floor, I agreed wholly - our family is ready. I was ready. I had, that very week, lamented that our house was just too big, so our home was ready too! When we asked Will what he would think about it, he said,"Sure, I think it'll be good too cuz I'm also old enough to help out." What a sweetie, right?

Well, that's when the research began and the decisions were made. I will post more about that in the future and do my best to include you all in this process!

I'm so happily overwhelmed that the Lord placed adoption on our hearts so many years ago, and through His perfect plan, revealed to us when the time was right. The perfect time. His time. This is something I will continue to remember as we deal with paperwork and the waiting until we can hold our little one who I am already so deeply in love with.


Matthew 18:5a
And whoever receives one such child in My name, also receives Me!